Get to know Tayler - the creator and founder of Slate Lifestyle
Hi my name is Tayler, I am the creator and founder of Slate Lifestyle.
Slate is more than just a clothing brand- it embodies a way of living. To embrace the Slate Lifestyle means to embrace your true self - and to truly embrace yourself you have to be willing to get to know all parts of yourself. This requires self-awareness, self-reflection, self-love, self-acceptance, patience and honesty. As someone who has been on an intense healing journey I created Slate to encourage others to heal and tap inward so they can live in true alignment.
My journey and why Slate advocates for authenticity and healing
My healing journey began in 2022, I was living in Long Beach finishing up my last semester of college. I was just going through the motions, following the path I've always thought I was supposed to follow- even though the entire 1.5 years I lived in Long Beach I knew I was finishing college for the sake of fear to change my mind. I would walk through life everyday feeling so HEAVY, like I couldn’t hold my head up. I was scared to collapse, scared to completely change my mind, scared to change my entire reality.
This all changed when I had an abrupt spiritual awakening that brought a newfound self-awareness - something I had never experienced before. I felt so alone during this time because no one I knew was experiencing this. I felt lost, scared, confused. My entire mind, body and soul levitated into an experience I was not at all expecting, and I couldn't even explain what I was going through, because I didn't even know what I was experiencing myself.
This awakening led me to deep self-reflection and self-discovery - I was a chronic people-pleaser. I had no real sense of self-identity. I was that person that avoided conflict, struggled to say no to others, seeked external validation, feared rejection or disapproval, low-key passive aggressive because I was scared to feel angry/be seen as someone who was angry, and I neglected my own needs to prioritize others. I was always the nice, outgoing person that everyone liked, but that was because I would mold into a version of me that I knew people would be comfortable with -This was all unconscious behavior (The shadow).
As I reflected on my childhood experiences, I realized my people pleasing tendencies were a trauma response to neglect I experienced in my childhood, specifically with my dad. Because of my dads stern and reserved presence, I became observant of his moods, I actively seeked his approval/acceptance, I shrunk in order to fit his expectations causing extreme perfectionism. I became scared to speak up because I always felt ignored and unimportant due to how he responded to things I was excited about. This all translated into how I operated in my adulthood. Uncovering the hard truths from my childhood was overwhelming, I felt like I had no idea who I even was, while also feeling anger and sadness towards my dad, and little Tayler.
After graduating college I moved to LA with my best friend which I knew wasn't the best idea based on my state of being and also my financial situation. But I did it anyways. 9 months later I move home and this is when I reallyyyyyyy started to heal. Living at home with my dad was triggering, but it forced me to confront my past. To heal I had to forgive (my dad, but also myself), I had to FEEL my feelings (physically not just understand them in my head), and I had to be so forreal with myself - my reality was changing and It was time to let go of my old self, which I resisted with every bone in my body. Changing my thinking patterns, and behaviors was challenging for me. I was stuck in this loop of self-awareness. I would experience something that was triggering and react the same way fully aware of my behavior, knowing I wanted to react differently. This is when real growth happens, in the midst of fear and chaos.
Needless to say my journey to self-acceptance, and self-discovery has been challenging, and is still continuous. But I am here and I wouldn’t change one thing. I have gained so much wisdom for the purpose of helping others. I believe everyone's healing journey looks different so I don’t want to share too much, because I was once a person who didn’t know her own truth and allowed too many people to try and tell me mine - friends, family, random people online. I listened to anyone but myself. I can't express enough how important it is to know that the answers we seek are inside us- we just have to be willing to listen, no matter what the answer is.
Welcome
My journey is what led me to create Slate Lifestyle - a clothing brand that advocates for healing and individuality in this world we live in. But not on a surface level because we hear that all the time right “just be you”- this isn’t always that easy. For many people discovering oneself is complex. If your struggle with self-identity and self-acceptance doesn't stem from your childhood experiences or trauma, It may stem from the fact that social media these days feeds us “trends” and “aesthetics” to aim for, when we should aim to just be ourselves. Regardless of your past experiences or what your healing journey looks like, the foundation for anyone to embark on their healing journey is first to look in the mirror and acknowledge their Shadow Self. It is important during the process to give yourself grace and know it is safe to feel what/how you feel. Healing requires you to be honest with yourself (because you may not like what you see), and it also requires forgiveness of those who played a role in your pain and suffering, but also forgiveness to yourself for the choices you’ve made. That being said, I am so glad you are here and a part of the community at Slate. I hope sharing my story (a very summarized version lol) can somehow help you on your journey. So much more than clothing coming soon!
With so much Love,
Tayler Solari